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Transitions – skills, knowledge and software

~ Lara Milvain ~ Leave a comment

Making my first “feature” (!) length video.

Here she is. Enjoy. After the panic died down, I did.

Exploring the concept of online dating after 50 was enlightening. It showed that firstly, there’s been plenty of research into online dating, but very little focussed on the challenges and movitations of older people engaging in the practice. What I did find that despite public impressions, it is being rapidly adopted, and is widely accepted by over-50s.

Creating the video was – as expected – the biggest challenge for the unit. Purely due to my inexperience. Our Tiffit challenges gave me a basic tool set. But I still wasn’t prepared for the enormity of the task. Producing a seven-minute video with nothing but an iPhone for shooting footage is for the brave, and possibly experienced.

I’d suspected I was going to experience issues, so I’d planned an escape route, if you will. A second topic researched and ready to go – it’s the one you see above. My initial attempt, around technological relevance in culture really needed “live” footage; even spent half a day at ScienceWorks having quite a bit of fun fiddling with shooting footage. Poor lighting and shaky video meant it was just not usable without advanced editing software. Which, I have to say, iMovie most certainly isn’t.

So, attempt two; less visually appealing than I’d like – that’s that inner perfectionist again – involved a commentary over a mixture of my own photos, infographics and some from others for thematic purposes. Selling soul for tripod-mountable camera!

From having, essentially, worked through the process twice, it would be much more efficient, and less time consuming to produce a video from your own live footage than the route I ended up using. Collecting, collating and recording attribution details for the creative commons content took up more than a day – shooting seven minutes of footage (in one go!) takes… well, seven minutes.

I did learn some really great stuff on the way. Like – in iMovie, the best way to format your credits is by copying them into textEdit to format, then paste back into the effects window. Much pain avoided. And, transitions are fiddly, finiky little creatures. You’ll likely see some examples where I’m still half a second late or early. Where I’d invest more time is audio; getting levels anywhere close to sane is a process not for the faint hearted; worth the time, for your viewer’s sake.

Again, likely because my experience is lacking, the scripting was the most mentally-taxing part of the process. But I suspect I’m only becoming comfortable with the video editing aspect because of the many elements I’m not even aware of yet; let alone mastered. I was learning, and trying new things inside iMovie right up to the minute before I exported the video.

There are limits to the technology I using. Specialist equipment would go a-ways towards increasing my confidence, and skills. But the most important thing, yep, it’s the learning by doing. My challenge to myself – do more, even if it’s unpublished. I’ve enjoyed the process. Onwards!

I did learn a couple of surprising factoids in the process. Abraham Maslow isn’t responsible for the famous pyramid – at least initially. His original text contains a detailed explanation of the structure, but no illustration. Likely because of the cost of incorporating engravings in publications in 1943.

And; while I was exploring the links between Myers-Briggs and the Johari Window I found that most of the people who rate as highly “Unrealistic” on the Myers-Briggs assessment (Nordvik 1996) are also the most likely preference of partner (Scott 2016). So, either the rest of us are delusional; or teachers, lawyers, flight attendants and designers have it right.

607 words

Nordvik, H 1996, ‘Relationships between Holland’s vocational typology, Schein’s career anchors and Myers-Briggs’ types’, Journal of Occupational and Organizational Psychology, vol. 69, no. 3, pp. 263–275.

Scott, K 2016, ‘What job is considered the most attractive by a potential partner?’, Employee Benefits, retrieved 10 May 2017, https://www.employeebenefits.co.uk/issues/september-online-2016/job-considered-attractive-potential-partner/.

Broader ALC203 activity

I’ve been continuing to tweet, and blog. And have made myself a presence on some additional social networking sites – updating and filling in details on my LinkedIn account and adding a Tumblr profile for curiosity’s sake.

Probably the biggest change in the last month has been producing my own artwork to identify myself online. Although it’s still a work in progress, I’m happy to say that my creativity has been inspired by the unit; and I’m confident that Week 12 isn’t the last you’ll see of me.

References for video – :youtu.be/0TrlK2FLcVo:

Video produced for ALC203, Trimester 1, 2017

References – Academic

Adams, MS, Oye, J & Parker, TS 2003, ‘Sexuality of older adults and the Internet: from sex education to cybersex.’, Sexual & Relationship Therapy, vol. 18, no. 3, pp. 405–415.

Alterovitz, S & Mendelsohn, G 2009, ‘Partner Preferences Across the Life Span: Online Dating by Older Adults’, Psychology and Aging, vol. 24, no. 2, pp. 513–517.

Cassavetes, N 2004, The Notebook, Warner Bros., retrieved May 13, 2017, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0332280/?ref_=ttfc_fc_tt.

Communication in the Real World: An Introduction to Communication Studies 2016, University of Minnesota Libraries Publishing, Minneapolis, MN, retrieved 10 May 2017, http://open.lib.umn.edu/communication/.

Coupland, J 2000, ‘Past the “Perfect Kind of Age”: Styling selves and Relationships in Over 50s Dating Advertisements’, Journal of Communication, vol. 50, no. 3, pp. 9–30.

Fileborn, B, Thorpe, R, Hawkes, G, Minichiello, V & Pitts, M 2015, ‘Sex and the older single girl: Experiences of sex and dating in later life’, Journal of Aging Studies, vol. 33, pp. 67–75.

Goode, E 1996, ‘Gender and courtship entitlement: responses to personal ads’, Sex Roles: A Journal of Research, vol. 34, no. 3/4, pp. 141–169.

Hillman, JL 2000, Clinical perspectives on elderly sexuality., Kluwer Academic Publishers, New York.

Hillman, JL 2012, Sexuality and aging: clinical perspectives, Springer, New York.

Luft, J & Ingham, H 1955, ‘The Johari Window, a graphic model for interpersonal relations’, in Western Training Laboratory in Group Development, UCLA Extension Office, Los Angeles.

Malta, S 2007, ‘Love Actually! Older Adults and their Romantic Internet Relationships’, Australian Journal of Emerging Technologies & Society, vol. 5, no. 2, pp. 84–102.

Maslow, AH 1943, ‘A theory of human motivation’, Psychological Review, vol. 50, no. 4, pp. 370–396.

McWilliams, S & Barrett, A 2014, ‘Online Dating in Middle and Later Life: Gendered Expectations and Experiences’, Journal of Family Issues, vol. 35, no. 3, pp. 411–436.

Miller, RK & Washington, KD 2017, Consumer use of the internet & mobile web 2016-2017 3rd edn, Richard K. Miller & Associates, Loganville, GA.

Nordvik, H 1996, ‘Relationships between Holland’s vocational typology, Schein’s career anchors and Myers-Briggs’ types’, Journal of Occupational and Organizational Psychology, vol. 69, no. 3, pp. 263–275.

Ramirez, A, Sumner, EM, Fleuriet, C & Cole, M 2015, ‘When Online Dating Partners Meet Offline: The Effect of Modality Switching on Relational Communication Between Online Daters’, Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication, vol. 20, no. 1, pp. 99–114.

Wang, C-C & Wang, Y-T 2010, ‘Who is Everyone’s Darling in Cyberspace? The Characteristics of Popular Online Daters’, International Journal of Cyber Society and Education, vol. 3, no. 1, pp. 69–98.

Credits – Photographic

Sodret, J (2014), dansen gamionios, https://www.flickr.com/photos/illusionwaltz

Seneca, T (2005), More Dolls, https://www.flickr.com/photos/misstracyjo/164673105

diepuppenstubensammierin (2011), caco grandmothers, https://www.flickr.com/photos/diepuppenstubensammlerin/5555981164

Lorena (2010), Perrine Doll, Mireya, https://www.flickr.com/photos/yaxchibonam/4531221109

Hopkins, K (2005), Dates, https://www.flickr.com/photos/accidentalhedonist/20699016

gatineaujoe (2013), A peel ing, https://www.flickr.com/photos/gatineaujoe/8455130240

Sodret, J (2014), Babydoll, https://www.flickr.com/photos/illusionwaltz/13452120604

MilanaAliana (2014), Boda Marina i Bernat 4, https://www.flickr.com/photos/milanaaliana/8469699847

Harrsch, M (2004), Henry VIII by Rexard, https://www.flickr.com/photos/mharrsch/309325

Bisson, S (2008), Onions in a port wine reduction, https://www.flickr.com/photos/kitchen/3056858503

alaig (2009), She’s a real doll … and so is he, https://www.flickr.com/photos/alaig/3709256128

Manor-Abel, Z (2012), Super Cyclin, https://www.flickr.com/photos/zoharma/8367486126

Pati (2008), Couple!, https://www.flickr.com/photos/hippydelia/4490312234

Hu, K (2010), Project_03, https://www.flickr.com/photos/kshark8/5674505365

Wayland, D (2012), Onions, https://www.flickr.com/photos/dw2/6052895359

Milvain, L (2017), Yellow Car, https://www.flickr.com/photos/laramilvain/34148796613 **

toohotty (2008), Gross Couple Dolls, https://www.flickr.com/photos/toohotty/2477452886

diepuppenstubensammierin (2011), 1960er Ari Hochzeitspaar, verschiedene Maßstäbe, https://www.flickr.com/photos/diepuppenstubensammlerin/6388267323

Larose, E (2010), I do, https://www.flickr.com/photos/dolldreamer/4543244557

Denness, G (2009), One for the road, https://www.flickr.com/photos/garydenness/3228402163

alicemelodolls (2017), A tale as old as time, https://www.flickr.com/photos/aliceswunderland2/32232700534

All licensed either CC BY-NC 2.0 or cc BY-NC-SA 2.0.
Infographics
Milvain, L (2017a), Johari Window, retrieved 29 May 2017, https://www.flickr.com/photos/laramilvain/34785876372

Milvain, L (2017b), Maslow, retrieved 29 May 2017, https://www.flickr.com/photos/laramilvain/34562136520

Milvain, L (2017c), Online Dating, retrieved 29 May 2017, https://www.flickr.com/photos/laramilvain/34571565890

Milvain, L (2017d), Characters, retrieved 29 May 2017, https://www.flickr.com/photos/laramilvain/34571676720 **

All licensed CC BY-NC-SA 2.0 and created by the author.

** Note: these entries, by the author, do not appear in the YouTube credits list as “Your description is too long”.

“Do not ever let anyone tell you this didn’t happen”

~ Lara Milvain ~ Leave a comment

It’s funny, a few weeks back a member of our cohort asked if anyone had some links they used to gather inspiration for writing. I answered quickly; nup – I just jot things down as I go, and use those. Maybe a sketchy memory of a dream, maybe something I’ve seen that day that’s inspired me.

And that’s about where my inspiration dried up. On the spot. It was like sharing that “secret” drained all my ideas. Until the weekend. Our media class had a field trip to Melbourne’s Jewish Holocaust Center. I’ve spent the last two days reeling through the lower end of my emotional repertoire.

It’s hard to fathom, even after 75 years’ analysis, what actually happened in Europe during the second world war. War itself is baffling enough to my generation; I was born at the tail end of Vietnam, and haven’t ever faced conscription, let alone actual participation. A skirmish here, another there; and two in the same place 10 years apart is the closest we’ve come in my lifetime. But nothing on the scale that ended oh-so-close to three quarters of a century ago.

I was lucky enough, though, to be “old” enough to have the chance to speak with my grandfather, CD Crellin, about his experiences in WWII. It was a blustery afternoon, and we stood at a large picture window in my family’s farmhouse lounge and nattered. Well, he nattered, I listened. He talked in hushed tones; as if speaking quietly of events somehow made them less fearsome. I was a writer – well, journalist – back then; and I kick myself to this day that I didn’t take down what he’d told me. Like Grandad, it’s lost to the foibles of time.

All I can gather now is a dry collection of his service records via (online) sources such as the Australian War Memorial and our National Archives. It’s a poor substitute, but in my youth I neglected to record his thoughts, so it will have to do.

One of our experiences during the weekend’s JHC visit was viewing a video our lecturer had made a few years ago with Phillip Maisel OAM, a nonagenarian who has taken the time, care and foresight to record thousands of survivor testimonies for the center.

Mr Maisel has gone to extraordinary lengths to record the memories of witnesses to that tragedy, to help ensure its events are never forgotten. It would be wonderful to think that maybe also one day some sense could be made of the massacre via these personal remembrances; but how can you make sense of the insane?

We were privileged, and I mean that sincerely, to have the opportunity to hear holocaust survivor Charles German speak. He didn’t “have a script”; and spoke from his heart. His tale of meeting, by chance and years later, two other child survivors of the same camp and their method of assessing their own truths – “if two of us have the same memory, we believe it to be true” is scientific enough for me. I’ve built my own childhood memories in a similar fashion; recounting stories with friends and family, finding similarities and amassing a fuller picture of our shared experiences.

What struck me hardest in Mr German’s address was the subtle, but enormous anger that crept into his voice when he spoke of holocaust denial. “Do not ever let anyone tell you this did not happen.” Delivered with quiet, but thorough disdain. A delivery only the truthful and the righteous could sustain. I agree with my classmates who have since written, questioning how there could be any doubt over the veracity of the holocaust and its tragic outcome for so many minority groups in Europe, not just Jewry. That it happened is bad enough; to pretend it didn’t is as horrific as the events themselves.

It’s almost too late now to gather much more first-hand evidence of WWII. The very youngest at its outbreak are now entering their eighth and ninth decades. We are out of time. Speak with these people; learn what they saw, feel what they felt. And record it – somehow – for following generations. It’s our way forward.

And: “Do not ever let anyone tell you this did not happen.”

 

More info:

Jewish Holocaust Center, Melbourne
Australian War Memorial records search
National Archives of Australia service records search

p.s. This is a wall of text by design. I do not own copyright to any images of the holocaust, and to use ‘found’ images which may or may not be authentic I believe risks disrespecting the happenings in Europe 75+ years ago.

A search using the twitter hashtag #ALC203 will return images taken during our visit on 30 April 2017 by others. I couldn’t stop shaking long enough to focus a camera.

Ayrendal & me: Examining the juncture between online and offline

~ Lara Milvain ~ Leave a comment
Ayrendal_1
Ayrendal (Blizzard Entertainment 2017). In-game screenshot created by the author, used with permission under Blizzard Entertainment’s limited use policy.

I have been performing versions of myself as characters in Blizzard Entertainment’s (2004) online game World of Warcraft (WoW) for close to 15 years now. My dominant online persona is a night elf druid called Ayrendal (Blizzard Entertainment 2017), the first character I created in the game and the one who has come to represent me not only in WoW, but in other aspects of my online life. When I first started this blog, I glibly named it “Ayrendal’s Adventures”, and even a quick glimpse at my About page – written at the time of establishing the blog – demonstrates at some level the interleaving of our personalities and histories. Ayrendal and I have had two significant relationships in the past 15 years. We married the first one, and are living with the second one now. Not bad for a country girl and a bunch of pixels put together from a template in an online game. I say “we”, as without Ayrendal neither relationship would have happened. Exactly how interrelated are we? Is she me? Am I her?

According to McKenna et al (2002, p. 9) I’m fairly typical, and becoming more so as social technologies are more commonly adopted. They say regular computer-mediated social interaction is leading to the formation of relationships. Further, they explain that anonymity – such as that provided by my use of Ayrendal as an avatar – encourages “greater intimacy and closeness”. Intimacy, in the view of Smith and Watson (2014, p. 70) is an aspect of authenticity – what makes us believable to those we encounter. Drawing those concepts together gives a clearer picture of my online behaviour. I am anonymous via Ayrendal, which helps me create intimacy with those I meet online, and that lends me authenticity, deepening those relationships to a degree I maybe would not find possible offline.

Tweet embedded from my own @ayrendal Twitter account.

Some proponents (Krotoski 2012) take an opposing view to McKenna et al (2002), believing that online anonymity prevents authenticity – that without showing (at least) your name, you cannot “be” the real you online. Krotoski’s subjects’ opinion is that without authenticity, intimacy is reduced and that without intimacy, relationships cannot be meaningful. In my unscientific, single-person sample of one, I believe both – romantic – relationships I have experienced have had meaning. They were started under a veil of anonymity, but as offline identities were revealed, they continued and grew.

Would it not be possible for me to form, offline, a relationship of the types I have initiated online? Stanton et al (2016, pp. 187-8) have studied the personalities of people who engage in mediated relationships through the twin lenses of intimacy and deception. As a participant in online relationships that grouping is, on the surface, highly confronting. While they acknowledge that those who set out to deceive others online are more likely to misrepresent themselves, their results clearly indicated “‘those who seek intimacy online also misrepresent themselves” (2016, p. 195).

OnlineMisrepresentation_Chart_1
Online Misrepresentation – statistics taken from Huang & Yang (2013). Infographic created by me using Piktochart.

Huang and Yang (2013, p. 1) reinforce this position, calling the phenomenon of online misrepresentation “universal”. They report more than 70% of respondents to their study admit misrepresenting themselves in online scenarios, with the most frequent incidences being over age or gender; and the most common rationales privacy and security.  Just looking at the image of Ayrendal, above, it is clearly true that I misrepresented myself. I am not a 10,000 year old, 7-foot tall, grey-skinned, green-haired, glow-eyed Amazonian carrying a large stick. Yet that is how I presented myself to initiate my former, and current, relationships.

Huang and Yang continue to say that the anonymity afforded in mediated relationships allows the removal of personal behavioural barriers (2013, p. 2). In a discussion of anonymity and authenticity in the social networking application Tinder a further explanation is provided regarding anonymity and online relationship building (Brianmccle 2015).

Tweet embedded from my own @ayrendal Twitter account.

The blog explains that by preserving anonymity the user is “protected from embarrassment”.  Both theories offer explanations as to why I found establishing relationships online easier than those in real life. The barriers of fear, belittlement – gone, because I could play-act any character I chose.

Tweet embedded from my own @ayrendal Twitter account.

In reality I’m the above. Not a green hair (although the lighting in the above shot may indicate otherwise…), nor an eye glow to be seen. Bridging the gap between my online self and real self was not traumatic. I have a bit of faux-chutzpah; I act a lot braver than I feel, but I had also selected an environment where there could be no mistake that my avatar was a direct physical representation of me, other than being female. However, Geraci and Geraci (2013, p. 335) point out that I may have been at least subconsciously influenced in the choice of my avatar’s appearance because it may boost my self esteem. They say that in part, the impossible physical attributes Ayrendal possesses help me mask potential feelings of inadequacy. In turn, that increase in empowerment gives me the confidence to initiate relationships I may otherwise have avoided, behaviour reflected in Huang and Yang’s (2013) studies.

…I am not a 10,000 year old, 7-foot tall, grey-skinned,
green-haired, glow-eyed Amazonian…

With anonymity helping me bridge the gap between my offline and online personalities, how soon did I introduce the “real” me into the equation? In the first instance it was a couple of months; the second, a matter of weeks. During my second experience there was an interesting shared history which encouraged me to open up private details quite early in the piece. Zogg and Hooper (2013, p. 329) highlight this as a demonstration of “value congruence”; a sharing of ideals and ideas that can increase the perception of trust, helping build a relationship. However, one possible danger of the convergence of my online and offline identities is the potential for my levels of comfort to become so great that I demonstrate pathological internet use. As explained by Bayraktar and Amca (2012, p. 264), a blurring of the lines between my avatar self and “myself” could lead to my habitual seeking of gratification online.

Returning, finally, to my original questions: am I Ayrendal? Is she me? I believe so. Although my influence on Ayrendal was obviously dominant in the early stage of her creation, over time we have become more and more closely integrated. We play together, work together – she’s in the background waiting for attention as I write this. For better or worse, we are linked – part of the same person – online, and off.

At least she takes up less room on the desk than the cat.

BooKeyboard
Maribu – a distant relative of keyboard cat – believes the assignment is done and she may now assert her natural right to the desk. Image taken by the author.

1032 words.

References

Bayraktar, F & Amca, H 2012, ‘Interrelations Between Virtual-World and Real-World Activities: Comparison of Genders, Age Groups, and Pathological and Nonpathological Internet Users’, Cyberpsychology, Behavior & Social Networking, vol. 15, no. 5, pp. 263-269, retrieved 03 April 2017, EBSCOhost database.

Blizzard Entertainment 2004, World of Warcraft, online game, Activision Blizzard, Santa Monica.

Blizzard Entertainment 2017, Ayrendal – Nagrand US, in-game screenshot, Activision Blizzard, Santa Monica, retrieved 01 April 2017.

Brianmccle 2015, The Me You Wanna Match: Automediality, Anonymity, & Authenticity on Tinder, 1 March, retrieved 30 March 2017, <https://selfierhetoric.net/2015/03/01/the-me-you-wanna-match-automediality-anonymity-authenticity-on-tinder/&gt;.

Geraci, R, & Geraci, J 2013, ‘Virtual gender: How men and women use videogame bodies’, Journal Of Gaming & Virtual Worlds, vol. 5, no. 3, pp. 329-348, doi: 10.1386/jgvw.5.3.329_1

Huang, C, & Yang, S 2013, ‘Study of online misrepresentation, self-disclosure, cyber-relationship motives, and loneliness among teenagers in taiwan’, Journal Of Educational Computing Research, vol. 48, no. 1, pp. 1-18, retrieved 01 April 2017, EBSCOhost database.

Krotoski, A 2012, Online identity: is authenticity or anonymity more important?, The Guardian, 20 April, retrieved 25 March 2017, <https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2012/apr/19/online-identity-authenticity-anonymity&gt;.

McKenna, K, Green, A, & Gleason, M 2002, ‘Relationship Formation on the Internet: What’s the Big Attraction?’, Journal Of Social Issues, vol. 58, no. 1, p. 9-31, retrieved 01 April 2017, EBSCOhost database.

Stanton, K, Ellickson-Larew, S, & Watson, D 2016, ‘Development and validation of a measure of online deception and intimacy’, Personality And Individual Differences, vol. 88, pp. 187-196, doi: 10.1016/j.paid.2015.09.015

Tinder 2017, Tinder, <https://gotinder.com&gt;

Zogg, A & Hooper, T 2013, ‘Does the Need to Belong Drive Risky Online Behavior?’, Proceedings Of The European Conference On Information Management & Evaluation, pp. 328-333, retrieved 01 April 2017, EBSCOhost database.

World of Warcraft, ©2004 Blizzard Entertainment, Inc. All rights reserved. World of Warcraft, Warcraft and Blizzard Entertainment are trademarks or registered trademarks of Blizzard Entertainment, Inc. in the U.S. and/or other countries.

My broader ALC203-related online activity

My primary activity has been on Twitter, and my blog. I’ve been aiming for a post a week on my blog, triggered by discussions within the unit hashtag, and from readings undertaken during the unit.

I’ve also delighted in using content creation tools; making my first little video, and uploading it to YouTube – for the practice at both content creation and distribution.

Black Mirror – Fifteen Million Merits

~ Lara Milvain ~ Leave a comment

**WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS**
(and I’m too cheap to pay for an upgrade to get /spoiler tags. Sorry – #studentlife )

Black Mirror. What a disturbing – but fabulous – little show. I’d managed to catch the third season on Netflix last year, and was transfixed by the episode Nosedive from start to end; but I’d not made my way back to the earlier seasons. When Fifteen Million Merits (“15MM” from hereon in, for the sake of my word count) appeared on our ‘homework’ list for ALC203 I was looking forward to it. But I wasn’t prepared for the in-your-face parallels this episode drew.

15MM brilliantly covered topics as broad as copyright infringement, social isolation and the all-pervasive nature of reality TV and the moral choices it offers its viewers. A fellow student also identified in his blog something I’d missed – an almost obsessive spending in a gamified world on cosmetic “upgrades” which have zero function. In fact, that blog entry reminded me that I needed unjumble my thoughts a bit and write this entry for my own good; so – thank you, Zach!

Because of the #studentlife issue mentioned above, I’m going to hide the rest of this behind a “more” tab. 1. I hope it works. And, 2. Please, please read on. And, 3. If you do, I hope it was worth it. Leave me a comment and let me know!

(Also, please lend me a link to a campaign for free /spoiler tags on WordPress.com!)

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